1-4-3

I switched to the nike app from the runmeter app that I was using to track my runs.  I was bummed to lose all my data and have to start fresh, but oh well.  I was just looking through my data from my runmeter app and the nike app and I have run ONE HUNDRED AND FORTY THREE MILES this year!!  That's freaking crazy-talk!!  

I have the key!!!

...to my new Apartment!!  I have been over there a few times this weekend just to look again and measure for furniture.  I am kinda bummed that I won't be able to take my kind sized bed, but it just isn't going to work in my room.  It would literally be a BED room.


Nicole and I went for a run in my new hometown.  Damn that is one hilly freakin' place!!


I can't WAIT to get in there next weekend and start calling it home :)


Other local action....  Finished "the book"  learned a LOT about myself and who I am and why I am and how to fix it all.  I can't recommend that book enough!


I joined a dating website at the suggestion of friends who felt it was time to "get back out there."  Apparently that's how "EVERYONE" does it now.  Remember... I have never done ANY of this before!!  I have been with Rick since I was basically still a child!!  So this is allllll new to me! So as part of my current 'learning about myself and growing as a person' experiment, I went for it... even though I was scared.  It's already been a positive experience and I really am learning a lot about what I like and don't like, and what I want in a partner someday.  SOMEDAY.  

The power of the playlist

I ran this morning because it's supposed to me in the mid 90's today, and humid, so I knew that if I didn't do it this morning, there was no way in hell I was going to do it this afternoon in the blazing sun and heat.  I haven't had a "good" run since the race I ran on Saturday.  It was SUPPOSED to be a 4 mile race, but it turned out to be a 5 miler.  False advertising!!!!  I did great though and totally rocked it!  Anyhoo....  I have run twice since then and both times have ended up doing more walking than running, which is HIGHLY IRRITATING!!!  I blame the weather, the 5 mile 4 mile race, and PMS ;-)

This morning I had gone around 2 miles and hit that wall I keep hitting and started walking.  I walked for a couple minutes and then Christina Aguilera's 'Candyman' came on.  I freaking DARE you to listen to that song and not get movin!'  Thanks to Xtina, I was able to run all the way back home. And THAT, my friends, is THE POWER OF THE PLAYLIST!!

I LOVE looking at other people's running playlists to see what motivates them and almost every time I do, I find fun stuff to add to my own.

Here's mine....

1. JAY-Z – 99 Problems
2. Soul Asylum – 99%
3. DJ Khaled – All I Do Is Win - Feat. T-Pain, Ludacris, Snoop Dogg & Rick Ross
4. Kid Rock – American Bad A**
5. Lenny Kravitz – Are You Gonna Go My Way
6. Sir Mix-A-Lot – Baby Got Back
7. Skrillex – Bangarang - feat. Sirah
8. Violent Femmes – Blister In The Sun
9. Beastie Boys – Body Movin'
10. Limp Bizkit – Break Stuff
11. Christina Aguilera – Candyman
12. Kid Rock – Cowboy
13. Survivor – Eye Of The Tiger
14. The Wanted – Glad You Came
15. Ludacris & Shawnna – How Low
16. The Black Keys – Howlin' For You
17. David Guetta – I Can Only Imagine - feat. Chris Brown & Lil Wayne
18. Hot Chelle Rae – I Like It Like That Featuring New Boyz
19. Anthrax – I'm The Man
20. RUN-DMC – It's Tricky
21. Calvin Harris feat. Ne-Yo – Let's Go - Radio Edit
22. The Black Keys – Lonely Boy
23. Alice In Chains – Man In The Box
24. Nickelback – Next Go Round
25. One Direction – One Thing
26. Barenaked Ladies – One Week
27. Maroon 5 – Payphone
28. Nicki Minaj – Pound The Alarm
29. Bruno Mars – Runaway Baby
30. Beastie Boys – Sabotage
31. Everclear – Santa Monica - 2004 Digital Remaster
32. Michael Franti & Spearhead – Say Hey (I Love You)
33. Pitbull – Shake Senora Remix Featuring T-Pain, Sean Paul & Ludacris
34. Puddle Of Mudd – She Hates Me
35. Jack White – Sixteen Saltines
36. Nirvana – Smells Like Teen Spirit
37. Soul Asylum – Somebody To Shove
38. Savage – Swing
39. Enrique Iglesias – Tonight (I'm F**kin' You)
40. Outasight – Tonight Is The Night
41. Chumbawamba – Tubthumping
42. One Direction – What Makes You Beautiful
43. Nicki Minaj – Whip It
44. Eminem – Won't Back Down (feat. P!nk)

Read this book.

Seriously.  I would even say that if you HAVEN'T gone through a break-up or a loss that you should read this book.  I have been reading it and doing the exercises this week and I have to say that I have learned SO much about myself and my relationships (all of them... not just the one with Rick) and why I do the thinks I do and feel the things I feel.


The subtitle of the book is 'How to Turn a Devastating Loss into the Best Thing That Ever Happened to You.'  And she means it.


Some stuff I have learned has been hard to face, and there have been lots of "AHA" moments.  Bottom line:  I fled my shitty home-life into Rick's arms.  He was older and "experienced." (I was 15, he was 'almost 20!') He was extremely attentive.  His family was fun and loving with each other.  His father worshiped the ground that his mother walked on.  I felt calm, and safe, and laughed often when spending time at his house.  My home life got better once I entered the relationship with Rick, I started actually attending classes at school (I was actually expelled when we first got together), and started thinking about my future and making changes accordingly to ensure that I actually HAD a future that didn't involve living in a car (which I was at the time).  Those were a couple of great years.  He definitely "saved me" and maybe I have always felt like I owed him my life for that?  There were SO many times I almost left, and tried to leave, even back then.  But something always made me stay... then the kids came along.... and life... and house-building....  It was easy to focus on all that stuff and avoid looking at anything else.  It wasn't until the kids got a little older and more independent, and I got the job at EAAA that I started to really change and grow up and realize that I am my own person with needs and wants that don't at all match those of Rick's.  Rick is a person who is content with things just 'being.'  I am not.  I want to DO!!  and GO!!  and MAKE!! and GO!! (I know I said GO!! twice :::wink:::)  Certainly Rick felt my starting to pull away, and took matters into his own hands (so to speak) and took control of the situation.... and here we are.


Wow I wasn't really planning on writing that much.  I just wanted to make you all read the book.  So, yeah.  Read the book.

Getaway

Nicole and I took a much needed mini-vacation to Massachusetts to see Dave Matthew's Band earlier this week.  We stayed with my Auntie Joyce and I had even more fun with her than I did at the concert!  It was so nice to be able to just relax and hang out with her for more than a quick little visit.  Got some video of my favorite DMB song ever 'Say Goodbye', that I was lucky enough to hear them play.  Ironically it's a song about cheating, which one would assume was not my favorite subject, but I have always loved this song and nobody can take that away from me :)  Also... had cheating not been a part of my life, I wouldn't now be free to live my life the way I choose and find the person that I am REALLY meant to be with.

I was incredibly tempted not to go with everything going on around here, but Nicole has always dreamed of seeing Dave, and she has 'taken one for the team' when it comes to going to concerts with me, so there was no way I was going to leave her hanging.  So glad I went.

Now we are in full-on packing mode!!!  I found an apartment in Winterport, which coincidentally is the same apartment I lived in as a teen with my mom and brothers.  WEIRD RIGHT!!??  We are moving July 1st and I CAN'T WAIT!!!!

Oh AND... I had a fun little visit with my favorite baby on Friday... and one of my favorite brothers ;-)  I already put 2 videos on facebook, but here's another!!