I can be silent NO MORE!!!

OK...this has been irritating me for some time now.


KY personal lubrication commercials. WTF!? These commercials are always a woman reading the bottle to entice the man to want to give her a little action. I would like to know where in the world this scenario goes down. Where in the world does a woman have to think up little tricks like reading from a bottle of lube...or even WORSE...calling her guy from a balcony on her cell phone to try to convince the guy ....who is putting together furniture (WAY better than sex!! <---insert sarcasm here)... to come do her!? Where does this stuff happen? How is this an ad campaign that works? In the world I live in...and I'm pretty sure I am NOT unusual here... there is no need to trick or entice a guy to have sex. The mere mention of the word 'sex'....or even any word that starts with the letter 's' and he is ready to go. Bending over to pick up a toy... offering to go to the kitchen to get him something... going to bed at the same time he does...going to bed before he does....going to bed after he does.... all considered foreplay in the male mind.

So...am I missing something here? Is there a whole other species of males that I have never heard of that DON'T have sex on the brain 24/7?? Males that would rather put together FURNITURE than get laid!?? If anyone has any evidence of this...I would love to hear it because I am truly vexed by this one.

And...I REALLY HATE THOSE COMMERCIALS!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Happy Birthday Sophie!

Note how my little attention hog insinuated himself into the birthday girls picture....
Today Sophie and Nicole came over to celebrate Sophie's 4th birthday. We had some yummy cupcakes and Sophie opened the present that Sean chose for her. Nicole was such a nice mommy that she even let Sophie open it right there and not wait until they got home!! Jessi got it all set up and the kids had fun playing with it...while Cooper had fun trying to steal all the little parts ;) I think Sean loved it the most...lol...which got Nicole and I talking about little boys doing 'little girl' things and how they all do that kind of stuff and what a weird place society is at right now with being accepting of gay people...but at the same time freaking out if thier little boy wants a Barbie for his birthday. Gotta love those deep philisophical chats ;) 

HOLY (S)CRAP!!!!

I ordered some BG ribbon and rub-ons from 4everscrappin.com cuz they were on clearance. I have ordered from them several times and always do pre-orders with them. This time when I ordered they had some shipping issues and my order took a loooooong time... and a few phone calls. She apologized up and down and said she'd add a little something extra for my trouble. I expected a sheet of stickers or a die cut. When my package came today and I opened it up....my jaw fell on the floor. She went ALL OUT...holy crap... I feel like a kid on Christmas morning! She even put in the new BG magnetic snaps I have been wanting!! The stuff on the left is what I ordered....ALL the stuff on the right is my free loot 'for my troubles!!!' WOW! I'd say she MORE than made up for them, ya think!? I will totally keep ordering there...if this is how she makes up for a mistake...they must not have many or she would be broke...lol!!

Bug sex....EWWWWWWWWWW

Jessi left the porch light on tonight...so when I went to let the doggies out for their last trip...I noticed that my porch is THE hot spot of the night!! These 2 didn't even bother to get a room! The whole time I was standing there waiting for them to do their duty...errr....doody (ROFL....I crack myself up)...I was crawling out of my skin. I HATE HATE HATE moths...they creep me RIGHT OUT!!

So...I decided if I had to endure it....you all get to also ;) It took all I had not to just smack those 2 and end all future generations of...whatever the hell they are...but I just couldn't do it. And I am NOT going to admit that it was partially because I was afraid that if I smacked those 2....the 5,000 other bugs around me and my porch light would retaliate and eat me alive...or worse...fly around me and crawl on me...lol. 

A buncha doggy pics :)

We are having so much fun with our doggies!

I thought the puppy would bother and tire out Nicky ...it's the other way around!! Nicky is LOVING having a playmate. I took this after the tenth game of 'let's run all the way around the house as fast as we possibly can'...Cooper had enough and on his way around the last time went to run into the house. Nicky was like, "HEY!? I thought we were playin' here!!"


Awwwwww........

Cooper doesn't just take a drink from a puddle...he praticically takes a SWIM in it!! I may have my very first water dog!



And one more..."awwwwwww" Guess that's enough for today...lol!!

Already one of the guys!

Things are going well so far! Cooper slept in his crate last night and seemed to be fine with that...he walked right in and laid down when I told him to. This morning I was awakened by a explosion of barking! I went down to investigate thinking the cat was outside crying to come in and Cooper and Sophie had not yet been introduced as when he arrived she was already out for her nightly hunting expedition ;) But...that was not the case. Jessi had woken up and come down to watch TV and Cooper was VERY EXCITED to get out of his crate to see her!! Today Cooper is settling down and settling in...he is SUCH a snuggler and the kids are LOVING that!! 

Cooper is FINALLY home!!

It was a long day waiting for our new family member to arrive! When he finally got here at 9pm, the kids were exhausted but perked right up as soon as thier new puppy came in the door. Cooper is still pretty nervous and feeling very, "WTH is going ON!?" But he is WONDERFUL with the kids and the kids are on cloud 9. Nicky and Cooper hit it off right away too and played for a little while, then both laid down at our feet while we had a VERY late supper. The kids are sulking off to bed now and Cooper is finally getting a chance to explore. More pics tomorrow!! :) 

Tomorrow is the day!!

Word on the street is tomorrow is PUPPY DAY! Of course....the word 'puppy' is being used VERY loosely since said puppy is about 7 months old now...BUT...I am not going to loose any sleep over that. His breeder tells me she has crate trained and taught him the basic commands ...so hey...I miss the cute fuzzy puppy weeks...but I ALSO loose the poop and pee everywhere...cry all night...outside trips every hour... weeks!! We are completely ready for Cooper's arrival! We've got the food...the toys....the collars and leashes. Poor old Nicky has no clue how his life is about to change ;)

I rearranged my scraproom yesterday and it feels like it has DOUBLED in size!! LOVES IT!! I can't believe I didn't think of putting it this way before. The way I had it made it feel SO small when we are all in there...which is a LOT more than I thought it would be when we built the house. Several evenings a week and almost every Sunday morning the whole family congregates in the scraproom. Jessi and I scrapbook...Rick does his online thang (hunting, fishing and football message boards...fantasy football...and other really stupid man stuff)... Nicky lays on the floor under the table...and Sean harrasses everyone ;) I looked around for a turnabout thingy to put on my table for pens and stuff but had no luck locally...so I was just about to order the one from Oriental Trading when I big ole lightbulb went on over my head! I had a big natural wood lazy susan that my father's ex-wife gave me in storage in the basement!!! EVEN BETTER!! So paired pottery barns idea using glasses for pens and stuff...with my lazy susan and VIOLA...instant CUTE...HANDY...table storage---that holds ALL my most used tools...not just pens and scissors!! YAY!

OK...it's NOT the blair witch...

So I guess I can go back to bed...I was just falling asleep when I suddenly heard THIS (be sure to turn up your computer to get the full effect). Holy crap ...and I mean that literally as the sound just about made me crap my pants...lol. It really sounds like something getting killed....and the fact that it even freaked out Grizzly Adams (AKA) Rick freaked ME out even more. He is supposed to KNOW what all the freakish sounds of the woods come from!!! So....downstairs I went...and back to sleep goes Grizzly. So I google "screaming noise at night" and find a blog where someone describes my exact sound...and then one of their commenters has a LINK to said sound!!! EUREKA THAT'S IT!!! It's just a fox...it's not the blair witch...it's not the last dying scream of a fair maiden....it's not my mother having one of her tourette's singing outbursts (sorry Mom...ROFL)...its JUST A FOX...

and I am off to bed :)

Boy for sale....all reasonable offers considered

Sean is DRIVING ME UP A WALL!!! Seriously. I think when he went to Swan Lake with his grandmother...she swung by the hospital for a drive by labotomy. Here is a SMALL....TEENEY...MINISCULE excerpt....

Me: Sean, that shovel is broken. You need to take it out back and throw it in the wood pile.

Sean: What shovel?

Me: The one IN YOUR HANDS!

Sean: This one? (holds up shovel)

Me: YES...THAT ONE!

(Sean begins to dig the ground with said shovel.)

Me: SEAN! Take THE SHOVEL to the wood pile. IT IS BROKEN!

Sean: The woodpile?

Me: YES...the WOODPILE!

Sean: Where is the woodpile?

Now...keep in mind this child spends at LEAST 5 hours a day playing in the yard and knows exactly where the woodpile is. I am ready to put HIM in the woodpile.

Me: Sean...you know where the woodpile is...in the back of the house. Take the shovel there now.

Sean: Ok...I would (his signature phase...not "I will"..it's ALWAYS "I would")

(he takes about five steps toward the backyard and begins AGAIN to dig...completely oblivious that I am still standing there on the porch watching him and waiting for him to do what he was told)

Me: SEAN!!!! TAKE THE SHOVEL TO THE WOODPILE

Sean: OK!! YOU DON'T HAVE TO TALK MAD TO ME! (this time he gets about 20 steps before a dragonfly flies past---which FYI---is NOT a rare occurance in our yard) MOMMY!! Did you see that dragonfly!? (he puts the shovel down and begins to to head in the direction of the dragonfly)

Me: (beyond my breaking point and moved on to the slow...methodic...'I will remain calm and I will not kill this child' voice) Yes I saw the dragonfly...now PLEASE take the shovel out back to the woodpile.

Sean: OH YEAH! (chuckles) I forgot about doin' that. I would!

This time Jessi walks with him to the pile as I'm sure she can see I am about to lose it and no good can come of that ;)

This kind of crap has gone on ALL DAY!! I even asked Rick, "OMG...do you think he might have ADHD? FOR REAL Rick, he can't even do one thing without losing track of what he doing!?" Rick says "NO! He can to0! He does all kinds of stuff without losing focus! Sean...get me my hat over there by the couch" Sean says ok...walks towards the hat but since the coffee table is in his way he instead sits on the coffee table and spins around on his butt...and while spinning the TV catches his eye and he stops to watch. Rick tells him again and he yells, "I AM GETTING IT!!" This time he runs and gets it and brings it to Rick....but I think I had already proved my point. ;) No....I don't really think he has ADHD....but many more days like today and I may have to change my anti-ritalin stance.

Just can't get enough of the magic....

My in-laws are in the midst of finally building the house they have always wanted to build. Things are not going smoothly...as is expected with house-building. So to aleve and avoid her frustration, my mother-in-law has gone into full-throttle Disneyworld planning mode....and she's draggin' me down with her ;) We have been planning all along to take a Disney trip at the beginning of next year when we get the tax bonus from paying off our construction loan, but I haven't really thought about it all that much with so much else always going on. That is, until this past week when MIL caught the Disney Bug.... 7 e-mails today alone titled 're: Disney!!' I don't know what it is about that place that makes me want to keep going back even though there are so many other places I have never been. It truly is magical. It is always perfectly clean, everyone is happy, it smells good, it tastes good....it even FEELS good with the warm Florida sunshine. So...as of right now---and already completely different than last night...lol--- (and this will be a riot to come back and read later when everything is COMPLETELY different....lol) here are the stats....

-Trip will take place at the beginning of February.
-We will spent the beginning of the week at the Disney All-Star Movies (cheap)...then move to the Animal Kingdom Lodge to spend the end of the week in a little luxury.
-We will rent a minivan 'just in case' we need it
-We WILL see the 'Hoop Dee Doo Revue' ....whether we like it or not :p I REALLY hope it is not as dumb as it looks...lol. MIL PROMISES me it's THE BEST SHOW EVER! I checked though and they do serve alcohol.....PHEW...no matter what....._I_ will enjoy myself ;)

That's about the gist of today's e-mails. But with her having just retired... and me just home bein' a mom... there is PLENTY of time for many more e-mails...intineraries...plan tweaks....and looooong chats reminiscing about past trips and speculating about our future trips. The planning really is half the fun!!

Scrap stuff...wrong blog...but I like this one better!!!

I scrapped til I crapped. Today's crop was a blast!! We made these SUPER CUTE Christmas albums out of chipboard and the Basic Grey Blitzen Papers....

Just making these took the whole day (ok...so it wasnt really the making of these as much as the chatting, laughing and goofing around that made the album take all day....lol), so I didn't work on any pages or anything. We learned/used different techiniques on most of the pages, plus made all kinds of little chipboardy doo-dads, shaker boxes, drop down pages, and stuff to embellish it. I can't wait to add my pictures...and think of what else I am going to do on the cover. Nicole decided to come along once she got out of going to a b'day party that she thought she may have to go to....so that made it even MORE FUN :) I think I finally learned my lesson and gave myself an attitude adjustment today. I always go into crops thinking I know all the 'cutting edge' stuff because I am on the boards and online galleries. Yet...I ALWAYS learn something new (today LOTS of things!)...and I ALWAYS have a blast!!

It's hot.

We are currently having a couple of the 5 or so days a year I wish I had AC. Even our swim yesterday (...as an aside...it was not Black Stream as Rick informed me later...it was/is known as "the rec" and is actually Soudabstacook (sp?????) stream...my bad...lol...sue me!) wasn't as refreshing as it could have been. Today Sean and I beat the heat after dropping Jessi off at a sleepover by wandering the aisles of Toys r' us and then playing with the hose outside. When Rick came home he and Sean played with water balloons while Nicole and I went to Dysarts Truck Stop for ice cream and hookers.

Tomorrow I will beat the heat in Air Conditioned comfort, scrappin' the day away! I can't wait! I am super excited about the adorable mini album we are making!

Well it has finally cooledd off enough to get my patootie into my scraproom to clean up a bit and pack for the crop ....so off I go!

ETA....I almost forgot! We got the best thing today at Toys r us! I got Sean a set of Uno cards (In a 'Cars' theme)...thinking it would help him in learning him numbers and critical thinking skills...he already knows his colors. I took out all the reverses and wilds and stuff before we played. We played 3 times already today and he LOVES it!! Turns out now only does he get to have fun and learn at the same time...but I get to practice my patience skills...lol. Turns out knowing his colors is one thing, but combining that knowledge along with having to choose whether to use the number OR the color is a tough concept for a 4 year old to grasp ;) We had fun tho! He is all over the house today pointing out numbers 'like in his new card game.' I wish I thought of it ages ago!

Simple Pleasures

Today has been a great day so far! No...we didn't go to Six Flags or Swan Lake or the beach. We did errands. Jessi needed a couple pairs of shorts so we stopped in old Navy and ended up getting her 2 pairs of shorts and 2 school outfits because we couldnt pass up the deals! (BTW...That store is a disaster...I mean...I expect Old Navy to be a mess, but today it looked like a major wind storm had swept through and completely trashed the store. And they had great kids clothes...but the adult clothing selection right now...WOW...Can you say "HOLY TACK-O-RAMA!?" Who wears that crap!?) Then we popped over to ACMoore as I was hoping they would have Elsie Flannigan's new book and I could get it with my coupon...so such luck...no luck at Joanns either (which BTW was also a disaster...WTH!?). Still ended up being a great stop tho as I discovered they are now carrying all the Rhonda Farrer stamps that I LOVE!! So I got me a set of those with my coupon! YAY! Then it was on to Shaw's where we got lots of yummy healthy stuff. We are eating healthier these days and shockingly...we are actually ENJOYING it!! I'm trying all kinds of new healthy flavorful recipes...we are all off soda (Well...Rick isn't quite there yet...but he will be since he is not enoying using his own $ to buy it since I won't anymore ;) )...and we are sticking to proper portion sizes. As a result we are all feeling better...sleeping better...and have tons more energy! We came home and I had the BEST sandwich that may become my new fav lunch... A whole wheat pita with bean sprouts, avocado slices and hummus. It was freakin' DELICOUS! And I must say I am pretty damn impressed with myself that my new fav sammich is vegetarian!

Thanks to the big oil companies I've had to get a little more clever with our Friday Field Trips. It just feels wasteful and frivolous to be trapezing all over the state every friday. So today I took the kids swimming at 'the old swimmin hole'. It's a long forgotten swimming area in Black Stream right right in town. Rick and I used to go there 'back in the day' to cool off (and stuff...rofl rofl) on hot days. The kids had a BLAST!! They are already begging to know when we can go back there.

OK....I gotta go play with my new stamps!!

Buwahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The CM lady I blogged about on June 30th just called me to let me know that next week she is going to start having workshops every Wednesday IN HER HOME, and would I like to come? My brain said, "ARE YOU FREAKING JOKING RIGHT NOW!! YOU COULDN'T PAY ME TO SET FOOT IN YOUR HOUSE AGAIN....NEVERMIND PLAN ON SPENDING 2 HOURS A WEEK THERE!!??" But...my mouth said, "Thank you for thinking of me, but I really don't scrap Creative Memories style, so I wouldn't be interested in that." Sometimes I think it might be neat to have Tourette's or some other disorder....just for a week or so ;)... that just allows me to say exactly what I want to say without worrying about that nasty conscience thing ;) ....like Karen Walker from Will and Grace....she cracks me right up!!

It's 7:43...now what?

Since I quit soda and caffeine I have more energy and am sleeping like a bazillion times better than I was. I wake up early and rearin' to go! It's great...BUT...It's 7:44 now and I have cleaned the house...done the dishes...fed the pets...had breakfast...checked my e-mail and messages....picked up and hosed down my porch (kids live out there and it gets just as messy as their rooms if I dont stay on top of it!) ...and did a load of laundry....so now what!? lol

Guess I have no excuse NOT to scrap today! I really should catch up my LO a week album, as I am like 10 weeks behind :0 Fortunately...thanks to this blog...it's easy to go back and see what we were up to those weeks ;)

Sean is in the kitchen making himself toast and getting a glass of milk to go with it....as he has been doing for the past month or so. Another of increasing examples of my not having any babies anymore :( I make that sad face....but the other day I ran into some Hampden friends that I lost touch with when we moved to Bangor at the grocery store on Sunday. They were shopping as a couple...alone...with no kids. My initial thought was...'where are the kids?'...then I remembered that their kids are now 16, 13 and 6...they can be home alone for awhile and Mom and Dad can go grocery shopping...or to dinner...or WHEREVER!!! I am definately down wit dat action!!

BIG BROTHER TONIGHT!!!

LOVES IT!!! I just love the backbiting, catfighting, sneakiness and snarkyness! It is TRULY bad TV... It is truly TRASH TV...and that's what makes it great!!

Jessi has a friend over tonight that stayed last night too. I am wondering if she has moved in and they are just not telling me?? ;) They are going to the lake tomorrow with B...and Sean too of course!

We only had 1 little t-storm today...a major improvment from yesterday's wacky weather!

I think I am going to a crop on Sunday. After 3 e-mails of enticement and peer pressure-'you KNOW you wanna...', I think the owner finally suceeded in getting me to go ;) I have been in a rut anyway not feeling like scrapping and maybe a crop is just what I need. Not sure yet if 'it's on'...gotta wait til Rick gets home from fixing his brothers girlfriends brakes (which is very nice of him to do considering that 'brother' still hasn't hooked up one of our bathrooms and has no immediate plans to do so...lucky for him Rick is the car fixer in the family...grrrrrrr...Rick is just too nice. I guess thats why we balance so well rofl) so I can ask him if he is working a 6 day week next week cuz if he is, then I won't go and waste the one day we have together. WOW HOLY RUN ON SENTENCE BATMAN!!! Added bonus and incentive to go...my stuff is still all packed from taking it to the lake with me.

OK....SHOW'S ON!!! GOTTA GO!

ETA: Well Rick is working 6 days...but is INSISTING I go anyway and have fun. So I'm goin!! YAY!!! Uh-oh...It just occured to me we might have the puppy then...so Rick will be dealing with that all day... oh well ...too late to cancel now ;)

HAPPY BIRTHDAY RICK!!

Happy Birthday Rick!!!!Happy Birthday Rick!!!!Happy Birthday Rick!!!!Happy Birthday Rick!!!!Happy Birthday Rick!!!! Happy Birthday Rick!!!!Happy Birthday Rick!!!!Happy Birthday Rick!!!!Happy Birthday Rick!!!!Happy Birthday Rick!!!! Happy Birthday Rick!!!!Happy Birthday Rick!!!! Happy Birthday Rick!!!!Happy Birthday Rick!!!!Happy Birthday Rick!!!! Happy Birthday Rick!!!!Happy Birthday Rick!!!! Happy Birthday Rick!!!!Happy Birthday Rick!!!!Happy Birthday Rick!!!!Happy Birthday Rick!!!!Happy Birthday Rick!!!!Happy Birthday Rick!!!!

Going to see Pirates of the Carribean today! WOO HOO! It's Rick's 37th (YIKES) birthday today, so we are celebrating with a movie and a trip to Walmart to get him the fancy schmany coffee maker he has been wanting. Jessi and Sean got him a $25 McDonalds card ....not my idea of a great gift, but Rick LOVES to stop there on the way to work for Egg McMuffins and coffee when he has extra cash. (Which isn't often...since he gets $50 every Friday to use as he wishes and it's usually gone by Sunday...lol ...thus illustrating the reason he needs to be ON an allowance ;) )


And a little present for the rest of us....

100 free prints!!!

I just ordered. Hopefully this place has decent quality photos, but if not...I only wasted 5.29 for the shipping. (Plus if they suck I can give them to Jessi to scrap... so it's not really a waste at all ;) )

My Summer Vacation by Nokia Jordan

Ahhhh vacation. I was so looking forward to a week of freedom. A week of being unable to communicate with home -base...rendering me to little more than a big time keeping device. Things didn’t quite go as planned.

Saturday- YAHOO!! I am tossed into Colleen’s pink and orange LLbean tote bag and we are OFF! I don’t get to relax quite yet as even tho the rest of the family is in a car right in front of us...they all feel the need to call each other every 14 minutes. As we near Moosehead Lake I feel my reception dwindle down to nothing and am HOME FREE!! I am casually tossed onto the counter to hopefully be forgotten about until next Saturday. (Although she could have at least plugged me in so I could enjoy my week of R&R with full juice...but no such luck.)

Sunday- Ahhh....this is the life. I lounge on the counter all day and look forward to a week of the leisure.

Monday- HEY LADY! What the heck!? I am ripped from a delightful nap, stuffed into a hot pocket and spend half the day at some stupid fair thing roasting in the pocket as she strolls around. Then...just as a start to get used to the heat and relax–hoping they don’t notice that I have all my bars, I am ripped out of her pocket and passed around like a bong at a grateful dead concert for all to use. While I am glad to be helpful, I could have done without Colleen angrily yelling into me for over an hour until my battery died. This is supposed to be vacation for cryin’ out loud!

Tuesday- This was my D-Day. Once again I am ripped from my perch on the windowsill overlooking the lake (plugged in at least this time). Into town we go where I get to call Colleen’s brother Tim. Tim reports all is well at home...and that he has only burned down the upstairs. (Ha Ha ...apparently Tim only packed half of his sense of humor when he went to house-sit ;) ) On the way back to the camp I am resting happily in Colleen’s lap when suddenly she begins to scream at Rick to pull over...something about a huge spider. He does ...and Colleen jumps out of the car, and as she does so, I go flying onto the side of the road. Apparently she doesn’t notice as after things settle down, I watch the car drive away :( I spend the rest of the day baking in the sun by the side of the road watching he cars go by. It just gets worse as night falls and the rain begins to pour. I narrowly miss being stepped on by a moose and 3 deer.

Wednesday- Another day spent by the side of the road alternating baking in the sun and getting drenched in the rain and mud splattered on me by cars passing by. None of these cars are Colleen coming to rescue me....as I’m sure she thinks she has just misplaced my somewhere in her car or at the lake house. Again, I spend the night in the wilderness with the creatures and the rain. In the evening I see Colleen pass by twice...she thinks maybe she left me at the store...she thinks wrong. Despite her careless disloyalty to me, I still manage to field 5 calls and 2 text messages for her.

Thursday- I have resigned myself to my fate as roadkill. Just as my battery begins to die. I see our van slow down and Rick comes and rescues me!!! MY HERO!! I am wet, I am muddy and my screen is all messed up, but I have been SAVED! Rick brings me home to Colleen and she is ECSTATIC to see me! She takes me all apart dries me off and gets all the mud out from my insides. She plugs me in to charge and I show her my lights to let her know I it’s not time to order that new RAZOR phone just yet ;) As she notices my screen start to work, she gets out the blow dryer to try to dry out my insides. I am left on my ledge to recooperate and recharge. A couple hours later I am good as new!! I even show everyone my stuff in town later and make some calls :) :) :)

Friday- Things are back to normal. I am back on the counter. I get a little trip out onto the deck where the weirdo that bought me takes my picture with the beautiful scenery of Mt Kineo behind me. What a Freak.

Saturday- Time to head home! Vacation is officially over. And that’s not a bad thing...as my week of leisure was not all I had thought it would be ;) 

It's 5am. I am up. That can only mean one thing...

It's CAMP DAY!!! Have a great week everyone :)