He said.... she said!

Well if you have read my DH's (on message board's it usually stands for 'dear husband'....for the sake of this blog insert another "d" word there) blog today you know his side of things... so I guess I need to share mine!!

I have been coming down with a cold the past couple days. Last night it really showed it's teeth at about 3am, so I went downstairs to take some Nyquil and fool around on the computer until it kicked in. The morning started out as it normally does... Jessi up at the crack of dawn down here snuggled up watching TV...Rick gets up and leaves for work at 7, Sean wakes up around then and comes in with me to watch TV while I catch a few more winks, or he goes downstairs with Jessi and they eat breakfast. This morning was was exhausted from being up in the night and the kids were downstairs... Rick was gone.... and I was snoozin' (sorta since the kids were in and out). All of a sudden both kids come FLYING into the bedroom in complete TERROR screaming that they heard something or someone down in the basement. I assure them that something must have fallen down or the cat knocked something down and sent them back downstairs. Then I think I hear Rick's voice... which was very strange since he is supposed to be at work. I get up and holler down..."Rick?" He says, "Yeah... it's me. I hit a deer and wrecked the Jimmy (his car)" and then walks out slamming the door behind him. No explanation... no nothing. So I run back in my room to throw some jeans on and run downstairs. He is outside with his father and the kids and he has his work's truck. Jessi comes back in and says, "Daddy has a dead deer outside and it's GROSS!!!" I tell her, "Go back out and tell your father to GET IN HERE NOW!!!!" She does and he comes in laughing and smiling and I am like..."What the heck happened!!?? Are you ok? That is NOT A JUST COME IN AND SAY THAT AND WALK BACK OUT THING!!?" He laughs and says, "I was just kidding, the Jimmy is fine, some lady hit it." He thinks he is a freaking riot right now. I don't. And I make it clear that not only do I not find him amusing... the kids didn't either when they were terrified that there was a tiger or Osama Bin Laden in the basement. Not only that... but HELLO!? It's ROADKILL... that is FREAKING DISGUSTING!!!!!!! He disagrees since he saw the whole incident and knows it's fresh because he was there. He heads off back to work. During the work day he manages to annoy me several more times over the phone (and in absentia since he left a big puddle of blood in the driveway that he covered up with a little dirt that Cooper then dug all up and ROLLED IN), but this blog is long enough as it is and I am not even DONE!

He comes home from work and heads down to the basement where he put the deer (on the BARE FLOOR leaking blood all over the place... but I digress....grrrrrr) until he could get home to carve it up (or whatever they call what they do it). The kids are gone to DQ with their Aunt Nancy and I am doing my best to ignore what I know Rick is doing. He is up and down the stairs, then he comes up and I hear him pull out a chair in the diningroom. I stroll in there thinking he must be done with the deer. Oh no... no such luck. I walk in to him sitting at my dingingroom table with 2 huge skinless deer legs... HOOVES AND ALL... hanging off the table. He didn't even bother to TAKE OFF THE TABLECLOTH!!!!! He did put down a small white kitchen trashbag under the main part... but didn't' even bother to move Sean's toys OR MY PURSE ...just put the trashbag right on top of it all!!!!! I was briefly speechless.... then the only speech I could muster would probably get me thrown off blogger forever (kids were gone so I was free to say ANYTHING!). I then decided that it would be best for all involved if I left. So I grabbed my keys and headed out for a little retail therapy at Joann's.

By the time I got home Rick had everything cleaned up... fortunately for him! As I tucked Jessi in to bed I told her to marry a metro-sexual!